“Black” is the new….black?

2008 is the blackest year ever. After years of being dogged, mocked, ridiculed and dismissed, black is back on that ass like white on rice. Don’t believe me? Check this out….

Barack Obama

Barack's about to drop 50 on McCain

Bright smile. Cute kids.  Reputed wicked jumpshot. Hip-hop fan. Future president. And he’s got Brown skin.

The Dark Knight

The Dark Knight crept up on everybody this year

Almost sinking the sinkable Titanic (looks like Jack can hold on) in domestic gross, this movie shattered everyone’s even lofty expectations for a comic book movie. It’s got a dark tone, a hero dressed in black, takes place largely at night and has Morgan Freeman. Cinema doesn’t get much blacker than this. Unless it’s Tyler Perry. Isn’t this so much better though?

And then there’s the RNC. Sure, we saw Rudy. We saw Palin. We saw Preggers Palin (whose taters looked as though they’re pregnant too). But in addition, we also saw the bizarrest parade of blacks to ever “grace” the stage of the RNC. Like:

Cowboy Troy

3 people you'll never see on "106th & Park"

3 people never seen on "106th & Park"

Or, “what would’ve happened to me if I bought a Kid Rock CD”. Cowboy Troy is 1/2 of a country music act that’s been around for a few years now. At the RNC, he spit some mean versage from the Pledge of Allegiance while Gretchen Wilson and some other dude named Rich (fitting, isn’t it?) simultaneously sang the National Anthem and hoped that this wasn’t secretely Kanye’s cousin.

A black guy, a woman, and a white guy closed out the night at the RNC to country music. Together. Man, those GOP’s are so inclusive. What have i been thinking? I think if I ever leave my job, I’m going to go into a field that has few blacks in it and stake my name there. I like the idea of becoming “Fireman Jerome”.

Ok, I have to vomit now and listen to some Lil’ Wayne.

Crazy Black Republicans in Crazy hats, t-shirts, pins, etc.

No, Nana, no!!!

Perhaps the only thing that might have upstaged the Cowboy Troy was the camera constantly panning the audience and showcasing the bizarre, delusional blacks in attendance. I’m not sure if this was done to support the GOP’s insistence that they aren’t a good ol’ boy party (didn’t Cowboy Troy prove that already?) or out of the camerman’s pure astonishment. Can you imagine the CNN producer from his station/trailor miked up with the camera man.

“Ok, Jonathan, let’s get some crowd reaction shots while Romney’s talking….pan over to section 241–Oh my God, isn’t that Anita Baker?? Are you getting this, J? Dear Lord, someone get Sharpton on the phone.”

Lil’ Wayne

Wayne uses Crest Platinum Strips

Wayne uses Crest Platinum Strips

Making more appearances than Barack, and single-handedly saving the music industry’s ass (see? People still buy CD’s!) with a whopping million+ units sold his first week, Lil’ Wayne–he of the rambling, incoherent rap songs on his latest Tha Carter III–had the biggest year of any artist around. He topped Kanye and 50 cent and Jay Z’s opening weeks combined. And I’m not listing him because he’s black, but moreso because his album release, while greatly expected, was definitely a dark horse to be such a huge hit. And off of a song about a !@#%#^ lollipop.

….

….

Ok, mainly because he’s black too, though.

Still: Black is the new black.

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1 Comment

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One response to ““Black” is the new….black?

  1. anita

    No, nana, no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Heh heh. My friend Harbeer put on his facebook status, “How come the Republicans can find a black cowboy to perform onstage and not bin Laden?”

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