So You Think You Can, Danza?

In an effort to prove to the nation that the teaching profession is worthy of the respect, accolades and social acceptance that comic book nerds are finally getting, the Philadelphia School Reform Commission and School District are going to vote on something that could reshape the face of public education:

First-year teacher Tony Danza.Danza

Tony Danza, he of Who’s the Boss? fame is interested in starring in a reality show about the profession called, “Teach”. Danza was last seen on TV hosting his own talk show The Tony Danza Show which could have also been summed up in one word.

Anyway, besides the ridiculousness of this idea–when asked what his favorite book was, Danza replied, “purple”–I can’t imagine that the Philly SD is going to allow something like this.

Tony’s past jobs ended less-than-stellarly; how’s he going to control a HS classroom when he couldn’t control Mona?

How’s he going to raise test scores, when he couldn’t even get a raise when he was scoring with Angela?

I mean shit, his daughter was last seen practicing witchcraft with Rose McGowan.

To boot, Danza’s going to co-teach English, though to be fair, I think that is contingent on him successfully completing his Rosetta Stone courses.

But still, if this vote goes through and “Teach” hits the airwaves this fall, I worry that this could open the gates for a host of other celebrities to join the teaching ranks. Just imagine a school boasting the following co-teacher faculty:

  • Drama Class (“Teaching you how to meet Woody Allen and wear too-small shirts”): Scarlett Johanssen
  • Music Class (“How to bring an innovative sound, trash it, and market to the masses. With white girl accompaniment.”): Black Eyed Peas
  • Choir (“Using your breasts to get the most out of your voice”): Jessica Simpson, Katie Perry
  • Audio/Visual Club (“Pissing on people on tape”): R. Kelly
  • Home Economic/Sewing (“Learning the tricks to using needle-point”): Amy Winehouse, Bobby Brown
  • Wood Class: Peter North, Nat Turner
  • Health/Healthy Relationships (“Learning the give and take of the hits that life throws at you”): Chris Brown (NEVER 4GET)


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2 responses to “So You Think You Can, Danza?

  1. Rich

    um…all this at my alma mater. Yes NE all the way…oh boy

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